Doctor Doni

Getting to Your Best Mental, Emotional, and Spiritual State with Matt Belair (Episode 146)

In today’s episode I interview Matt Belair, a performance coach who has a ton of experience helping athletes, traveling, and learning about spiritual realms from different areas of the world. Now he is helping people by coaching them on their performance in their life.

Matt has studied human potential his entire life. He has dedicated himself to uncovering and expanding the limits of human potential and consciousness. He is an accomplished athlete, sought after high performance coach, host of the Master Mind, Body, and Spirit show which, reached #1 in iTunes in over 10 countries and is a best-selling author helping people live lives of passion purpose, fulfillment, and success.

In this episode we stop for a moment to have a conversation we don’t normally even think about having. In our very busy lives, we do not normally stop and ask, “Am I really doing what I want with my life?” And “If I wanted to do something else with my life how could I even do that?”

For Matt this came very naturally in high school, he was very curious about spiritual matters and the idea of who he was, why was he here and what the heck is going on in this planet. His whole pursuit was trying to find the truth to the deeper questions in life about spirituality.

I think it takes a lot of courage to follow a path like that one. It’s along the lines of a really philosophical path of asking who are we as humans and what are we meant to do. Trying to find answers to questions that we do not normally ask ourselves or others like “what is the meaning of life?” or “why do you think you’re here?”, “what is most important to you?”, “how do we find happiness here?”, “what challenges or struggles are you going through?” and “how do we live up to our highest potential?”.

So today we go deep into these ideas to see how we can implement them into our own lives to improve our life quality and also to find ways in which we can support our families and friends in their lives.

Bringing Exercise and the Spiritual Together

Martial Arts is one of the only sports that tends to blend the concepts of exercise and spirituality. Matt learned all about this by studying about Bruce Lee and travelling to China to work with Shaolin Monks. 

In martial arts you have this mental, emotional, spiritual and focus side where you learn how to control your emotions, visualize your goal, and calm your mind. This takes away all the noise off your mind and lets you really focus to attain your goal, through meditation and energy direction.

Martial arts also have a very tough physical side in which you teach your body to endure enormous amounts of stress and pain, so you really test the limits of the human body.

The combination of the two makes a whole, you can’t have one without the other if you want to achieve your highest potential. 

If you apply that kind of dedication to what is most meaningful to you in this life, then there is no way that you could fail, you will succeed at some level, whether it’s a great success or a minimal success, as long as it matters to you it will still be a success.

So, you have to start by asking yourself what matters to you most and why, what are your values and how do you want to live your life.

Most of the time we do not ask ourselves these questions, we wake up and we just start going through our to-do list, running through tasks and we think we are tired, and we don’t have time for that. But the truth is it might be hard but you have to make time for this self-reflection so you can steer your life into doing the thing that you love.

Manifestation and The Law of Attraction

The God force is a concept that Matt developed stating that some greater force created us and that we are here for a reason.

This creation force has the power to change your life in any kind of way. On the other hand, there is the Zen concept where we are constantly influencing our reality and we can use the law of attraction: “I attract more to my life of whatever I give my attention, energy and focus to, whether positive or negative”. But you must also listen to that inner voice telling you who you really are, what kind of person do you really want to be.

Traveling and Broadening Your Perspective

There is a lot of value to traveling and listening to other people’s perspectives, learning about other cultures, looking at different realities other than our own.

There is a concept called The Formula for Truth, where the basic idea is that all information out there is just that, information. We have our own perspective and other people have their perspective. 

What we often do is defend our point of view and our ideas, which are mostly based on our life experience, instead of opening completely to the other person’s perspective, point of view and opinions. 

What this does is it narrows our world, and we keep being stuck in our small reality instead of being more open, having a greater degree of pattern recognition, and a higher acuity to discern the truth. If we have more information about different topics then we are more likely to be free to act and take action to attain our goals.

Vibrations of the Energetic States

A lot of times we assume we do not have control over these states, but when we look at techniques like meditation for example or even just a gratitude journal, research shows that when we put intention into these activities that we can shift into a state of joy, love and gratitude and therefore shift our energetic state.

Most people believe that they are victims to their emotional states, but emotions are just the result of an external stimulus that creates an internal response. And the reality is that you can control those internal responses. We just need to take a minute, some deep breaths and choose how we want our internal response to look like. With practice we will not just automatically jump into the first internal response or emotion we feel.

It is absolutely normal to feel negative emotions like frustration, but we can choose not to react in frustration or to live in frustration even. So when you get up and life is frustrating you maybe stop reacting to it in that way and start realizing that frustration is part of life, this way you can start building your mental resilience.

To be easy and kind on yourself is also very important. If we can be a little kinder and more compassionate to ourselves, we can create a little space where we can separate the critical thoughts from ourselves and identify how do we really want to respond to any external stimulus. 

Being Committed (but Not Attached) to the Outcome

It’s all about being in alignment, congruent to yourself and enjoying the process. If you enjoy the process, you will be able to act from power, because no matter the outcome you will have had success as you enjoy the process and grow as a person while on it.

The path of following your dreams and purpose is probably going to be way harder than getting a comfy job and paying your bills, but it will also be much more rewarding.

It’s about figuring out what is most important to you and how can you take that and use it to contribute to other people. If you have a pure intent and you do your best, the outcome you get will be much more satisfying and fulfilling than the one you will get if you are not true to yourself, whether that outcome is a huge success or not.

It’s important to identify the reasons why you are doing what you’re doing and do it for the right reasons. For example, if your only motivation is money, it’s very unlikely that you will have a fulfilling outcome in what you’re doing. You could see yourself in a situation where you start to sacrifice your values and that, in the end, causes a dissonance that leads to suffering.

Potentially, this whole entire human experience could be this opportunity to not sell our souls.

When we’re ok with what we have and what we do, when we’re ok with our trust and relationships, when we’re proud of ourselves and act with integrity, we are going to be in a powerful mental, emotional and spiritual state, and we are going to be more empowered in our decision making and, most importantly, when we die and we face that mirror on the other side we’re going to have less regrets because we will know we did our best.

If you want to reach out to Matt Belair and learn how he can help you, please have a look at his website or his Instagram @matt.belair.

If you want to learn more about my approach on how you can reconnect with yourself by overcoming trauma and stress and applying my SelfC.A.R.E. approach so you get back to feeling your best, you may want to start by reading my book Master Your Stress Reset Your Health

In the book, I share the quiz I developed to help you identify how stress has affected you specifically by knowing your Stress Type. You can also take the Stress Type Quiz online.


Dr. Doni Stress Quiz

For the most comprehensive support, even with the most difficult health issues (physical or mental), it is best to meet with me one-on-one, which is available to you no matter where you are in the world (via phone or zoom). You can set up a one-on-one appointment with me here.

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